One of the biggest questions ever asked to me is this: “What’s the secret to happiness?.” The answer: THERE IS NO SECRET THE ANSWER IS IN YOU! YOUR THE KEY TO HAPPINESS!
There are many people that are walking around just miserable. This can be due to pain from the past that you cannot get over, a deep seated issue that was never resolved, many disappointments and let downs from those that you love most, or just the feeling of loneliness. (If your sadness is so bad that you feel that you are wanting to hurt yourself or commit suicide please contact the Suicide Hotline for help).
One thing I learned is that happiness believe or not is a choice! I know this sounds crazy but it is true in more ways then one. You can just relax and sit and think about a situation and rationalize that the situation really isn’t as bad as it seems, or you can start to do techniques that will help you to find your happiness again. You have to choose to do this though. You have to get to a point where you are sick and tired of being sick and tired.
Not sure if your happy? Try this chart posted by Iheartinspiration:Pretty simple chart right? It’s simple, either you want change or you don’t. You have to push past the pain in order to see some results and regain the happiness that you lost. This article is going to help you regain your happiness! I have 7 fast ways to help you regain your happiness as soon as possible, why would you want to hold onto sadness when you can start to live your life again and enjoy every bit of it.
7 fast ways to create happiness
- LET GO OF THE PAST: I know your looking at me and rolling your eyes I did too when someone told me this. I would think “I can’t do that” “The pain is too deep” “The bad memories are still there”. The face of the matter is you can in fact let go of the past. You know what helped me let go, realizing that the past is the past for a reason! Its behind you! Done! Over! The only reason it keeps coming up is because you are bringing it up. Thinking about it over and over. Reliving and recounting things in your mind, how you could of changed something. My thought process was why am I wasting my life trying to change thngs that are done and over with. I don’t have a time machine to go back and change it so why am I still letting it control me? You should occupy your time so there isn’t much free time for you to think on these things. Focus on what happened and why your past still effects you , and then LET IT GO BECAUSE YOU CANNOT CHANGE IT.
- FORGIVE YOURSELF THEN FORGIVE OTHERS: Forgiveness seems like a hard thing to do at times but it relates back to letting go of your past. While you are harboring anger for those that hurt you they are out living their lives and not thinking twice about it. Why not let it go and live your life as well? Not forgiving causes bitterness and unnecessary anger , this in turn causes depression due to the inability to resolve a conflict that has already passed. Can you forgive someone that has not apologized? YES YOU CAN. It’s a personal choice. Just realize that the moment has gone and happiness awaits, your happiness. The next step is to forgive yourself. Everything you go through is a lesson, make it just that. The decisions you made you wanted to make at one time, bad or good, you made that decision and you learned. If it was a bad mistake take that lesson , don’t make it again, and school others so that they don’t make it again. Anything is worth your happiness, so forgive yourself and move on!
- FIND A HOBBY AND STICK WITH IT: It’s been proven that when we have free time we think a whole lot more. Most of the thoughts are negative ones and this causes overthinking and over analyzing. When you find yourself a hobby and something to fill up that free time you have a lot less time to worry and stress. Think about the things that you used to enjoy doing. Play piano? Draw? Sing? Gym? Find out what is that you love and make a routine to do so everyday. I had recently got into coloring as a stress reliever and I realized that I actually enjoy it! As juvenile as it seemed it calmed me down because I had to focus on what I was doing . USA Today did an article on coloring to release stress you can read it HERE. If you cannot find a hobby give this a shot!
- STAY OFF OF SOCIAL MEDIA: This one is hard! Trust me I know. I am on social media AS WE SPEAK! Our phones are attached to our hips and our laptops are sitting in our houses ready for us when we get home. Why is social media so bad? Well this is an easy way to constantly to compare our lives to others. Why aren’t we as pretty as them? Why aren’t we as successful as them? I messaged him/her , they didn’t respond but they are on FB. I know how all of it goes lol. The fact of the matter is that we need a break. We can’t keep seeing what we aren’t by stalking those on social media and comparing ourselves to others. Try to stay off of social media at least once a week. Take that time to do something for yourself . Enjoy that hobby you created in step three. Invite a friend to lunch or even go out to eat yourself!
- SAY NO: Sometimes we take on too many tasks and we become overwhelmed. We always want to help others and don’t want to leave anyone stuck or stranded but sometimes doing so can hinder your growth if your doing too much. You cannot forfeit your happiness on account of someone else. First before you say yes to someone on a task think about if it will put you out of your way or effect your happiness. If the answer is yes it will then kindly decline and move on. You can also postpone and tell them you can do it at another time when it is more convenient for you. The key point is put yourself first.
- EXCERCISE YOUR BODY: Taking care of your body is the main key to happiness. Food effects the way you think and your emotions. Something such as dehydration lead to depression. READ THIS ARTICLE TO SEE HOW DEHYDRATION CAN AFFECT YOUR EMOTIONS. I used to hate running but running boosts the endorphins in your brain and this causes happiness! Active.com has a wonderful article on how running makes you happier. Starting out and exercising can be hard at first but once you get into the swing of things it gets easier, you just have to be consistent. Start out with just 2 days a week of workouts and build from there. Drink pretty of water and stay hydrated and happiness will be well on the way!
- DO THINGS FOR OTHERS: For me this was a hard concept to grasp. I was very selfish especially because of the pain that I had gone through in my life. I always felt like how can I help someone when 1. no one has helped me in my pain and suffering 2. I have nothing to offer anyone else. I felt inadequate and that I was not strong enough to do for anyone else. I soon learned that doing good for other people not only helps them but it also helped me! It gave me that warm and fuzzy feeling inside that I was apart of something bigger then myself. It also helped me to take my mind off of what I was going through. I also realized that my problems at time were not as bad as others. Not that I was happy of what they went through but it made me see that the world was much bigger then my little bubble. You can do these easy and simple things to start doing for others:
- Offer to help someone in need
- Donate money to a shelter that needs it
- Offer to but someone lunch
- Give a compliment and make someone smile
- Offer up support to someone in need and ask to help them in anyway you can
Happiness is the set goal for all of us. These 7 keys that I have given you are just baby steps for you to start and grow off of. There are many more things that you can do to maintain your happiness once you have it. The biggest bit of advice that I received that helped me was to be true to myself. Embrace what I had been through , learn from it, grow from it , and don’t let it consume my life. Happiness can be a constant and never ending battle but if you don’t start somewhere you will never be happy. At times I felt that I was forcing myself through these steps, realize you ARE and you MAY HAVE TO. It had to be forced and you have to keep reminding yourself as to why you must do these things. Get your life back! Maintain. Keep it pushing!
I don’t often share my story but if you want to read more about it you can go to my about me page and see what I’ve experienced.
Along with happiness you need to have positive thinking. A positive thinker is a happy person. Think about it! All the positive people I know are happy and carefree. They don’t worry about things they cannot change. They focus on future and accomplishing their goals. Positive thinking is a task that had to be practiced. It’s not easy. If you would like o learn about positive thinking click here to connect to my previous blog post.