I know when you read this your response was shock and awe. Bitter bitch syndrome? What the hell is that? Come on now ladies lets not act like you don’t know what the bitter bitch syndrome is because we all have a little of that inside of us. You can admit to your bitter bitch syndrome or don’t but I know the truth! Have you heard of the bitch resting face? Then you know that this syndrome closely follows.
We all have those bad days, bad moments, bad everything. We just can’t seem to get right! The world has done us wrong, neglected us, and beat us to a pulp. We don’t know how to respond, heal, deal with it head on and this is the result: THE BITTER BITCH SYNDROME!
What is the Bitter Bitch Syndrome?
Is it a real thing? Of course it is! Anything you read in urban dictionary is real right? When I was breezing World Star Hip Hop I saw this video about the bitter bitch syndrome and I decided to look it up. Imagine my surprise when I saw that “that was me!”.
Bitter Bitch Syndrome: When a bitch (sorry for the foul language but to me its a term of endearment) is bitter about her life and the things that have happened to her and decides to take it out on the world
ANYONE THAT HAS EXPERIENCED ANY TYPE OF TRAUMA, ABUSE, LET DOWN, OR HURT HAS EXPERIENCED THIS I GAURENTEE IT!
A trauma that I am not shy of talking about is my experience with domestic violence. When I came out of that situation I was a bitter bitch! I was so angry. Mad at him, mad at me, mad at my friends for not helping me (although they didn’t know it was happening). I was just MAD MAD MAD. I was exactly what that definition said! Everyone asked me why at you so mad all the time, crazy part was I knew but I wasn’t sure as to why everyone else had to catch my hell.
I have the Bitter Bitch Syndrome! Now what?
You may be like , hmmmm, that’s me and start panicking. No worries I got your back. I call myself the hyper survivor, this is because I went from having the Bitter Bitch Syndrome to becoming happy successful and realizing that the world DID NOT END b/c of my trauma.
I realized that the reason I had this issue was because I was looking for someone, anyone to blame. I was taking out all the hurt and pain that I couldn’t take out on the individual that hurt me. I was forcing my hurts onto others that truly loved me and I was pushing them away! Sound like you? I know… The good part is, ITS OK. There’s a cure for you! Read the steps below.
The Cure for Bitter Bitch Syndrome
- ACKNOWLEDGE YOUR HURT: It is so annoying and painful to keep reliving and event that you experienced that was traumatic. When I went to a counselor I hated those days. I was always angry because I had to keep telling the same story over and over and over again. The truth of the matter is though that its OK to be angry, its OK to be sad and hurt, its OK! Accept that it has happened and grieve it! Let it all go and cry it out girl, its ok!
- UNDERSTAND THAT HEALING TAKES TIME: When I started going to the counselor I thought after the first few sessions, “I’m goochie! No more Bitter Bitch Syndrome for me!” boy was I wrong ! All it took was for one triggering event to set me off all over again. Realize that HEALING TAKES TIME! Use this time for your self discovery. Write down the events that made you mad or hurt you. Weed through the situation and use it to make you a better person. Give yourself time.
- STOP SUPPRESSING YOUR DAMN FEELINGS GIRL!: If anything strikes a nerve with me its this! When I was younger in high school I used to always make bows and arrows out of rubber bands and paperclips. (Don’t act like yall never did this man). I’d use a pencil, slip it into my bow and let her rip! Well suppressing your feelings is exactly like that! The more you hold it in the more it boils inside of you and guess what?! Right that Bitter Bitch Syndrome is up and popping! Talk whatever it is that irks you with a friend, your mom, a counselor, anyone. Just get it out! I promise you will feel better.
- HELP HEAL ANOTHER BITTER BITCH: So as I stated earlier we ALL have had this syndrome at one point of our lives or another. Once you have gotten your healing help out another with those same hurts. Sometimes we don’t know that we are bitter. To us we are protecting ourselves and guarding ourselves. Now, don’t go up to your homey and be like “You have Bitter Bitch Syndrome let me help you”. Ease into it and be there for her because like you she needs to know the steps to get out of this nasty situation.
I’m Healed, but I have my tendencies
So even though we have seen that we have had the syndrome and we have done what we needed to do to get out of it those old bitter tendencies does creep back every once in a while. Guess what ITS OK. Before you go off the handle, take the time to evaluate what’s going on. I’m having a bitch fit, let me calm down. And that’s it!
A big part of healing is staying positive read my blog post on Positivity and make sure you continue to be guided in your emotions and use your mind to evaluate your experience and continue to grow emotionally and mentally.
The Bitter Bitch Syndrome is not permanent and remember there is a cure!